FOTP: Kindness

This will be a fairly short blog post, and there will be no pictures, as I am writing this on my lunch break at work!

If you're friends with me on Facebook, you might have read that today is quite a bittersweet day for me...tonight is the Jasmine Star photography business seminar that I have been SO excited about since I bought my ticket...I've been "meeting" other attendees through our group Facebook page, and can't wait to soak up all the photographical wisdom, experience, insight and love tonight!

However....

Yesterday I had to take She-Ra back to Dr. Wang at the Nashville Vet Specialists.  The infection in her front paw took over with a vengeance this weekend - by Sunday, her front leg was twice as large as the other, and quite warm. Monday morning I woke up, and found she had licked a hole in the leg.  You read that right.  Obviously, I was pretty upset.  She-Ra and I loaded up in the truck.  When I went to get the update from Dr. Wang after work, it was determined that She-Ra would stay over night and Dermatology would perform a biopsy (biopsies?) today with She-Ra under anesthesia.  They let me take her out for a walk and sit with her for a little, and then they took her back. 

Torture.

They will perform the biopsy after 3 today, which means that as I am supposed to be getting crazy excited about meeting a photographic rock star, I will also be wondering how in the world my girl is.  And I will be waiting and watching my phone for the call that will let me know she woke up from anesthesia, and just how bad (or not bad?!) the infection is.

FOTP??

I am choosing to focus on the KINDNESS that the employees at NVS have shown She-Ra.  When I dropped her off in the morning, the vet tech who has been with her from the start (Meredith) was there to greet us.  She-Ra perked up, and loved all over her.  Meredith, in kind, was loving all over She-Ra.  I love Meredith.  Dr. Wang always sits on the floor when she is talking with us, and again, She-Ra LOVES her.  And yes, I love Dr. Wang too.  Becca took her back last night, and said repeatedly how great a dog She-Ra is, and how beautiful she is.  (I just met Becca, but now I love her, because She-Ra IS great and beautiful!)  They let me know that I am free to call in the middle of the night to check on her if need be (or just because!), as they are staffed 24/7.  In this very scary time, I am comforted that She-Ra is comfortable with those caring for her, and so very grateful for them!

As my friend Kimberlee posted the other day - "every single person you see is struggling with something and to them it is just as hard as what you are going through" (Nicholas Sparks, Dear John).  I hope that you can find and focus on some positive aspect - however tiny - of whatever it is you are going through.

Crazy Dreams....

I really do have crazy dreams.  Boyfriend makes fun of them all the time, and I have no rebuttal, because I certainly have no idea where they come from!  In this case, however, I'm talking about a song.  I have recently started watching my DVRd episodes of Smash.  I'm undecided if I love it or not at this point, but on one episode, Megan Hilty's character sings "Crazy Dreams"...here are the lyrics:

Hello you long shots

You dark horse runners

Hairbrush singers, dashboard drummers

Hello you wild magnolias

Just waiting to bloom

There's a little bit of all that inside of me and you

Thank God even crazy dreams come true

I stood at the bottom of some walls I thought I couldn't climb

I felt like Cinderella at the ball just running out of time

So I know how it feels to be afraid

Think that it's all gonna slip away

Hold on, hold on

Here's to you free souls, you firefly chasers

Tree climbers, porch swingers, air guitar players

Here's to you fearless dancers, shaking walls in your bedrooms

There's a lot of wonder left inside of me and you

Thank God even crazy dreams come true

Never let a bad day be enough

To go and talk you in to giving up

Sometimes everybody feels like you

Oh, feels like you, just like you

Thank God even crazy dreams come true

Thank God even crazy dreams come true

Well, I couldn't help but feel that song speak to me.  Now I love music.  LOVE it.  It's playing in the background 99% of my day (either really playing, or playing in my mind!).  But there are a few songs that have absolutely smacked me in the face with their words and have either motivated me, or validated me, or just said exactly what I wanted to say.  Crazy Dreams has now been added to that list.  

Previous list-makers:  

~ 2003: Feels Like Today by Rascal Flatts (I was in a funk upon arriving at my first Army unit, and this song was my get-over-yourself-and-move-on song)

~ 2005: Great Light of the World by Bebo Norman (my entire Baghdad deployment: "Oh great Light of the World, fill up my soul...")

~ 2006: Evanescence's Fallen album.  I was in a partially dark place after Baghdad, and so many of her songs were too.  But they are also beautiful, and the disc was on repeat for a few weeks (plus, who doesn't love that part at the end of My Immortal when her soft voice leads to her band rocking out?!).

~ 2008: I Was Here by Lady Antebellum (one of the songs for the 2008 Olympics).  I can't play this loud enough.  I would provide all the lyrics, because I love them so much, but that's not what this blog post is about.  (Just the chorus, because now I have it on repeat as I'm typing:  "I wanna do somethin' that matters, say somethin' different, somethin' that sets the whole world on its ear.  I wanna do somethin' better with the time I've been given.  And I wanna try to touch a few hearts in this life, and leave nothin' less, than somethin' that says, 'I was here'...and I know that I, I will do more than just pass through this life...")

Back to Crazy Dreams...well, I have this crazy dream of making photography a full-time gig.  Sometimes I feel like there are SO MANY of us out there with our digital cameras snapping away trying to take it to the next level, what makes me think I'm any different?  I'm moving slowly, but that's how I like it.  Ok, sometimes I wish things would move faster, but I like taking my time learning some of this new stuff.  So.  Much.  New.  Stuff.  Sometimes I wonder why I bother learning all this new stuff,  when I was perfectly happy with my pictures before!  Hmmm...perfectly happy?  Weeelllll......   Then why did I beg Boyfriend for PSE10 for Christmas when PSE7 was working just fine?  Why did I save for my new 50mm lens?  Why did I leap at the chance to nab Lightroom 3 on sale the other day?  Why am I absolutely chomping at the bit and counting down the hours until Jasmine Star's photog seminar in Nashville  (79 and 1/2 hrs at the time of this writing!)?  And why am I obsessively pouring over photog blogs for tips, support and inspiration?!  Well apparently I want this crazy dream.  WANT.  DESIRE.  LONG FOR.  I know it may take awhile.  I know I still have oh so very much to learn.  I know it won't happen tomorrow, or even next year.  But it will happen.  Day by day, lesson by lesson, and picture by picture.  And PS, I am TOTALLY also a hairbrush singer :).

Hello you long shots, You dark horse runners...Hairbrush singers, dashboard drummers...Hello you wild magnolias, Just waiting to bloom....